Dear ladies, don’t let people rule YOUR decision of having a baby. In most families, everyone other than the mother, decides when to have a child. Women are seen as a baby producing machine. Our society and families do not ask women if they are ready to have a baby or not, if they are ready to take that responsibility or not – instead that there questions revolve around WHEN and WHY NOT?

When a woman becomes a mother, there are so many changes that her body is subjected to – mentally and physically. After two years of marriage, when I was pregnant for the first time, I was scared. I had a miscarriage at that time. Right after that everyone in my family started to ask me whether I was going to try for another baby. I was not sure if I was ready for one more pregnancy. When everyone kept asking for it, I and my husband thought we should try. Now I have a 4-year-old, whom I love the most. He is my top priority. Everyone is asking me about when I am planning to have another baby now. Many people around me are “worried” that as I am 29 years old, I might not be as fertile after 30.

People said, “If you get a baby after 30, it would not be healthy. You might not be able to conceive later and there are many complications in a pregnancy after 30.” And interestingly, a lot of these statements are not supported by medical or scientific facts but simple myths and misconceptions. Yes, pregnancy at later age can get complicated but when and how? A doctor is a right person to guide you regarding this. Because each woman’s body is different, each woman’s relationship or marriage, financial situation and rest of the aspects might be different. Hence, a “template” no more works – it just creates unnecessary pressure on couples.

Right now, I don’t think I am ready for the responsibility of another child. So, my answer is a straight NO. I will have another one when I am ready. The social cycle was different in the past. More women stayed at home and their primary duty was to raise kids and take care of the family. Situation is different now.

Today, there are women who choose to be stay-at-home moms and then there are working mothers and it is all about a CHOICE. Choice of what one wants to do with their life, what are their priorities and how they want to manage them. Many women want to work and have a career just as men do. And we as a part of this society and an individual should try as much as possible to non-judgmental about someone else’s choices around their life and uterus.

Ladies, don’t let other people rule your life. You have to make that decision. Nobody besides you, know when is the right time. 22 to 30 is a good child bearing age for women but with medical advancement, healthy babies can be produced after 30. It is your and your partner’s decision on when to have a child. Do not let other people take that decision for you. Let the right person help you and guide you to take the decision. And that right person/s is you, your partners and your Doctor’s advise. There is no right age to have a baby. The only right age is when you are ready for it.

6 Myths Clarified About Women Getting Pregnant in 30s and Late Thirties

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