First and foremost, I am a fierce mother bear! I am goofy, clumsy, unintentionally funny and a self proclaimed Facebook junky and I love to read and write. I also have a very bad habit of poking my nose where it may not belong and occasional foot in mouth syndrome. I believe that happiness is a choice and that’s why I chose to be happy under any circumstance.

I have a son who is a special child, as he is on autism spectrum and diagnosed to have PDD (Pediatric Developmental disorder) , not otherwise specified.

Heartbreaks……A mom goes through so much heartbreaks that its pain is unimaginable!

Every time I see my son, Shaurya smiling, I feel joy, but I feel my heart breaking because he still cannot express his fears, pains, hunger and basic needs.

Every time I forget to take him to bathroom and he pees wherever he is sitting and doesn’t acknowledge it, my heart breaks.

Every time I take him to his special school and the knowledge that he may not flourish in a regular school my heart breaks.

Every time I take him for his therapies and the fact that he doesn’t have time for swimming, football, art and music classes, my heart breaks.

Every time I make him hold the pen and hold his wrists to help him write, that holding of his wrists makes my heart break.

Every time I see him in parties for other kids (a rare thing, he doesn’t get invited much), and I see him lost there, my heart breaks.

Every time I play catch with him, play hide and seek with him, the thing that he doesn’t have his own friends to play with, breaks my heart.

Every time I see kids of his age doing things that my son will never be able to do, and even if he does, the appropriate age for doing the same will be gone, my heart breaks.

Whenever he sees any pictures and says mumma, but doesn’t say it to me even when I am just there, my heart breaks.

There are so many instances my heart breaks into pieces……But every time, I also know that he loves me. Unconditionally. He comes and hugs me, kisses me on forehead and he doesn’t want anything in return. A kind of love not many get, a love which doesn’t require anything in return..

Heartbreaks will always be there, so would be the love.

Moms cherish your kids, don’t take anything for granted, celebrate your kids life, his/her achievements, just think what you got many would die for that!

They say that when your heart feels heavy, communicate. Sharing makes the burden go light.

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